Friday...Some People Just Need To Get Real At Times

So, I went to my old job, to collect my Food Handlers Certificate that
was hanging on the wall. The customers who were so use to seeing me
actually showed me so love. They told me my talents were far better than
what this place had to offer me. They also said that if I need some help
in finding another foodie job, let them know, they know people with
places, businesses. I collect about 5 phone numbers in all. I also had a
talk with the store manager.

In more or less words, he told me he fucked up, and that he lied to save
his ass. See, this would've blown all over had the store manager been
Spanish or Black, but he is White. I never had a problem with him with
the 2 years that I've been working at this store. He said that he came
in the office on the back end of the convo with me and the bookkeeper
and that he didn't know what was going on. I told him, asked him, why
didn't he just tell the truth. He was speechless, didn't know what to
say. He hurried up and walked away, went back to what he was doing.

Like I said, I gave me letter that I was leaving, so expressing to the
store manager how I felt...wasn't even worth the air I breathe. This
incident will come back and haunt him in the future..I hope it does. I
knew I did nothing wrong to warrant the bookkeeper yelling at me. With
his having a 'thing' for her, the bookkeeper, he felt he was protecting
her honor or some shit I guess.

The good thing about my present job is that its something I never did
before, another aspect of a small business that about to either wither
away and die or blow up in the future. One thing is this... about 30 to
40 employees. About 4 to 8, including myself are Black. NONE of them
work in the area I work in though. Some that shows me that I can move up
here and get out of the cold, cause I dislike the cold.

Without saying what I do, cause I signed a discourse agreement, I help
in the process of making fresh juices. My station is Prep. I peel, slice
and cut cases of fruit. This causes me to stand in one place for long,
long periods of time, something I am use to. One thing I'm going to
suggest is that they get some one professional to come once a week and
sharpen the knifes. I not to go at sharpening them myself and a good
sharp knife plays a BIG key in putting out a good product.

One of the fall backs of this new job is that I can't do the things that
I'm use to doing when at my old job...Twitter and my blog. Right now its
4:33am, and I'm on the F train writing this. So any entries have to be
done before or after work.

I don't know if I will be at this job for long, I mean I like it and
all, but I'm use to customer service. Slicing meats and cheese, making
sandwiches and fresh salads to order. But mainly talking with my
customers. Here, they, my coworkers all they speak is Spanish and they
don't talk to me cause I don't speak Spanish. In fact, we had a meeting
yesterday with some one to translate to Spanish what was being said.
This made a 20 minute meeting go into an hour. The body, when its use to
doing something, and then there is a breaking in what it was doing,
well, my body tends to freeze up and get sore. But that won't happen
much though.
--michaelchappell

Wednesday Morning

Ok, so I'm use to waking up early in the morning. But since I'm
starting a new job this morning and I have to take 2 trains, sleep
didn't come easy last night.

I shouldn't have taken that nap for n3 hours, I think that's what did me
in. But I'm standing here in front of the place ready to go at 6am. Wish
I could have taken a sleeping pill.
--michaelchappell

Whatv Are They Trying To Do?

Ok, my employer called me, no, I called my deli manager. He told me the
owner said that either I come back to the store on the floor as a stock
the shelves person, or transfer to another store to be working in the
deli. Well, right now I'm at orientation of a new job that I got. I made
my mind up with what im about to do. Guess I'm moving on.
--michaelchappell

Angry Birds

Since I don't have an iphone, I downloaded Angry Birds for my laptop. I
hooked on this game. Its taken me 3 weeks just to get off this one
panel. My nephew, I put it on his laptop, and he is way ahead of me. Its
not fair. He told me that I'm not a gamer. This is coming from a 9 year
old.
--michaelchappell

The Hardest Part Is..

...waiting. They tell you that they want you and they say to expect a
phone call from them. But still, the hardest part is waiting. I dislike
waiting, no for real. Its either right here and now, or never. Always
been like that.

Even when hanging out with friends, I won't wait for you, but will meet
you there. But not with my old army buddies though. The know the meaning
of right here and now. My friends now, f I want to borrow their car.. I
throw in money and a half tank of gas, but its like pulling teeth for
the keys. Army buddies...see me when you return the car. I'm talking
about my army buddies from the late 70's too.

But I'm still sending my resume out like clockwork. I'm not putting all
my eggs in one basket, gotta keep searching. This place called me to
interview, got the job. I have orientation on Tuesday down in Manhattan
on West 29th Street. Had to buy a Metro Card, they are 29 dollars now
for 7 days. Man, shit is expensive to travel around NyC.
--michaelchappell

My Interview Today

Like I said its been a while since I had to go on these interviews. But
this one, I had a good feeling about. Organic juices, they supply them
for Whole Foods Supermarkets. Since I answered thru Craigslist, thought
there would be quite a number of people there, only one other person,
the another came 20 minutes after I arrived.

Person who did the interview said that he has a good feeling about me,
wants me to be on his team. I guess its because of my resume, I worked
on a cruise ship before. He wanted to know more about that than anything
else. Said he wanted to give it a shot. I told him, you leave everything
behind and just go. You sleep on the ship, 5 month tour, 2 weeks
vacation, then 5 month tour again. I stressed its 12 to 14 hour work
days, 7 days a week. His face changed when I said this. Told him that if
he's a good cook, worker and can follow instructions, you'll no
problems. Said he would look into it.

Now, he says he will call by Saturday to start on Monday, hope so.
--michaelchappell

Another Interview

Day before yesterday, sent my resume out, got a response, by phone in
like 5 minutes. Interview on the 7 line at 9:40am, Production Team Crew.
Don't know what that consists of, but I know I can do it.
--michaelchappell

Monday

Ok, I'm headed to an interview and its 2:40pm. Its scheduled for 4pm,
but I hate being late for anything. This feels funny though, butterflies
in my stomach, shit running thru my head. I'm not being cocky or
anything, but when I email my resume, 5 minutes later I got a response.
Thing is that there are probably 100's of people wanting the same
position, but I'm not going to let that stop me either.

Jobs are very hard to come by, but they are out there. Mostly as waiters
and busboys, dishwashers and preps. I will take anything right about
now. Maybe this suspension is a good thing. I mean I didn't hate going
into work, its just that I wanted to do more.

I spoke with my mother about this also, she gave me some good advice
too. If they are willing to lose me, cut me loose, they must expect that
my department's intake for the week is going to fall way off. And, she
said that if they allow you to come back, don't, move on. I'm gonna take
her advice, cause she knows people and how they act.

But since this has happened my mood has changed. Its like a strange
feeling that I'm not use to. Hard to explain, I guess its called being
afraid. That I am. I'm use to getting up and having certain routines
that I do every morning. This morning, I didn't get out of bed til 7am.
I'm usually up at 4, 4:30am. Plus, I kept waking up through out the
night too. Well, the body does know when change enters your life and it
reacts I guess.

On the train with the standard interview attire on, minus the tire.
Dislike wearing ties, don't know why. My housemate saw me before I left,
and she said that I look completely different from the way she is use to
seeing me. A good sign? She also told me to break a leg, more good luck
I guess.

I will see.
--michaelchappell

Some Shit..I Just Have No Control Over, and....

I can admit when I'm wrong. There isn't no harm in telling the truth, so
why lie. Most people lie because they are afraid to admit that they're
wrong in any given situation. I would tell the truth no matter what in
any situation.

I say this cause, I think I'm about to lose my job. Right now, I'm on
suspension, not pending termination though, but shit doesn't feel right.
Too many people got together and told a big lie to cover their asses.
The lie they told it to, is the owner, and I sat down and spoke with him
about this. But he is going with what his store, and assistant managers
tell him.

I'm upset about the whole thing cause its one big lie. You can do
whatever you want to me, but don't lie on me cause all I have is my
word. The owner told me that he isn't trying to fire me..yeah right.
I've been doing this for far too long to believe anything anyone tells
me. But this shit has got me down in more than one way.

To craigslist I went, looking at postings. Since Friday, sent out about
100 resumes. Today, went to mother's house, she could tell straight off
something was bothering me, so I told her. Her being her, she said '
fuck 'em', they're gonna lose a great worker. She asked me what I needed
from her. She gave me what I asked for too. While there, I sent out more
resumes, and got a email back from a place that's opening up tomorrow,
and then a call. The woman who called said she needs what I have and
fast. Tomorrow at 4pm I am to meet with her, 38th Street & Madison Ave.

Funny thing is...for the last 2 to 3 months I've been sending out
feelers and have got some responses too. But the interviews were during
the time I was suppose to be at work, so I couldn't make it. One place
wanted me so bad that they were willing to come to my place to see how I
operated without me knowing they wanted the address, but I wouldn't give
it to them. Another place wanted me there by 5pm, but my relief didn't
show up til 5:15pm. They didn't get wrote up for being late either, but
I told them in kind words that people do have a life to do other things
too.

I'm hoping this interview works out. I don't want to be part of the
unemployed, its not a good feeling.
--michaelchappell

Friday.....

I've been working since the age of 14, 1974 and I've learned some things
over the years. One, you have to enjoy what you do for an living and
two... you can't do it all just because of the money, for the money.
Number two is..lets say, you have to refer to number one first.

I know that some jobs, task can be stressful as all hell, been there and
done that. But you have to take a very deep breath, gather your thoughts
and move on, ahead. Some people aren't and can't be like that, that am
away of. Some people are place in situations to see if they can handle
the stress that comes with the job cause maybe, just maybe, there is no
one just right for this position and they just happened to come along
and they meet certain requirements. What these requirements are, are
left up to the employer. From my experience, the requirements mainly
fall on skin color.

I know some people can and won't understand this. But look at you job
site, take a good look around, see what skin color who are mainly and
mostly in charge. Not all work sites are like this. But look at your
police and fire departments, look at your lawyers and doctors, JUST LOOK
!!

Another thing I know is this, we all can't and don't have a great day
all the time. Shit happens outside of work, and we do bring that madness
with us to work sometimes also. But what I'm talking about is the stress
that people bring upon themselves and take it bout on those who they
supervise. That's just isn't right and I have never done that to anyone
no matter what. Oh, but those in supervisory positions do it all day and
everyday. They become to being used to doing it, that the owners of the
businesses that employed them, see that they can do no wrong. Well they
are wrong and this shit has got to stop.

I was sent home yesterday at work because of one of these situations. I
knew something was wrong cause I head the store manager say, with anger
in his voice, 'I got to do this shit'. Then the Bookkeeper started
yelling at me for something that she mistakenly thought I said, and the
store manager heard her yelling at me, then he told me to clock out and
go home. But before he did that, he cursed at me on the floor, pointed
his finger in my face and threatened me. All of this in front of
customers.

I did what I was told, clocked out and called the Union. They haven't
contacted me yet, but I'm waiting. This madness has to stop.
--michaelchappell

Thursday

My deli manager, on Tuesday told the powers that be, that he is
leaving, resigning or quitting. Today, all during my working hours, I'm
gonna try to kick some sense into him.

The reason why he is leaving, cause they promise him Deli Manager's pay,
and its been over a year and a half, and he still hasn't received it.
But this is the same motherfucker who I worked with in another store,
who quit to reignite his boxing career, only to be told that one more
punch and he will be a vegetable.

So, they hired him back, he called from Kentucky saying that he needs to
work. He was gone for 6 months, and they gave him his old pay back. But
to me, I think there was something else involved. By the way he is
African. Yeah, this has a lot to do with it. Like clockwork, he would go
to the owner's office and ask about his deli manager's pay. There was
always some excuse. I told him that if hasn't got it by now, he never
will.

He told them he was leaving in July. WTF ?? Why wait 90 days? He sent
his wife and her 2 kids back to Kentucky. I tell him that he isn't going
anywhere. There are no jobs in Kentucky, and you're leaving a job here
in NY cause he won't pay you what you THINK you should get ?. Be lucky
you have a job I say.

He says he doesn't want to be in a shelter, cause he can't afford paying
rent plus utilities, and for food. Well for one, you should have said
something to your wife who runs to McDonald's chance she gets and pays
with a credit card. Oh, she doesn't even have a job. Do this...

Send the wife and kids to her mothers house and send 125 dollars a week,
500 a month..that's all. Get your shit together here.
--michaelchappell

I'm trying to think of a reasonable answer, something that would make sense, to those that will see this, so...

I'm taking a look at this whole credit thing. It doesn't make any sense to me. Let me explain. So, I'm working and earn a living. You give me a card, that allows me to purchase things with you companies name, and you charge me for doing this. Never mind the fact, that I DO have the money saved up for the purchase I want. But you, the company, don't take into account or want to hear anything when it comes to me losing my job. All you, the company want is your money. And, if I'm late for a payment, you charge me for that also. That to me sounds like a rip off.

I have friends who for years thought that their job was secured because they have been there for years. Only to be let go, and their whole world has come tumbling down. Lost the co op, lost the car, and are being sued by credit card companies for falling to make payments. They are trying to borrow money from loan sharks, but they don't have a job. Its sad.

Today, there are commericals about improving your credit history. Jobs are even checking your credit history before even hiring you, and to me that's sad. But that's what makes this country run, credit, good faith. From 1988 I stop using credit cards cause its a crazy concept to me. If I were to have a family, kids, car payments, and a house payments, yeah, it would be different. But I don't need that right now.

Its just like education, continuing your education. People lose their jobs, and the first thing they say, going BACK to school so I can get more learning, more training. Me, I say your going back to get more bills. School cost money and if you have no job, all you're getting is education that you pay for on loan. For those straight out of High School, its a different story, I don't include you, you're 'future buying power', cause that what it is.

A coworker, who is a manager, is now receiving calls at work for failure to pay one of his credit cards.he makes way more than I do, but he has a family to support. All he is worrying about is his credit rating being destroyed. I say, his good credit history is history now.

I watch a documentary the other night. It was about the USA, and what would happened if the USA wasn't there for all these countries that depend on us. We are having problems of our own here, but our government is always extending their hands to other countries when THIS country needs help also. If we pulled out from helping all this countries, income tax would be cut in half. All the money we spend on defense, that could and would go to a better health care and other things. But those who are in country see this,and they don't see this.

I don't know any more.
--michaelchappell

Some People

I don't know why... Take my manager, he calls me, I don't hear the
phone ring, but he leaves no voice message. So, I call him back. Normal
people, when you call them, they answer hello, he doesn't say a word.
Then, he like pauses before he speaks and that shit pisses me off.

The reason why he calls is because he wife keeps messing up her laptop
and he thinks I will keep on fixing it for free. I told him, since he is
off on Wednesday, bring it by my house with a $60 deposit, and I will
work on it. He asked can I do it for free, cause he has no money. For
one, I told him, I already did this laptop 2 times already, along with
your desktop AND your kids laptop, ALL for free. He doesn't understand
if I attach a price to the wok I do. So, I cut him off. Will only talk
with him just at work and no where else.

A close friend of mine a woman, who is job searching called me crying.
Telling me how hard it is, no jobs out there, trying for months. After I
got off the phone with her, my housemate asked me what time I have to be
at work. She has an interview at 9am, could I babysit. Even offered me
60 dollars for 3 hours. I told her I have some one who will do it for
her. I called my friend. She asks all these questions about the kid and
all. Hell, the kid will still be sleeping until at least 1pm, and the
mother will be back by then. She told me she can't do it. WTF !? No
money, no job, easy job..babysitting a sleeping kid? What part is hard
for you to do.?

I'm tired of being alone, but then again I'm too lazy to start a
relationship. Casual sex is fine with me..in a way. I don't want to play
games just in order to get in bed with you. Its either you're with it or
not. This 'do you miss me', yes, come over, 'oh I have to take a
raincheck' shit is stupid. But its ok I tell her. Watch this time next
year, you'll be with a kid cause you got with some one that you thought
was a keeper, watch. By then it will be too late, I don't want a ready
made family, not unless I have met you like that for the first time. Its
too late when you go ahead and have a child by some asshole who you
thought would stay and be around. Not to mention that he has kids all
over the neighborhood.

--michaelchappell

Why....

Why do people tend to drop their bullshit on me. I mean, if you're going
thru something and you call to tell me about it, be prepared to hear my
opinion. I don't care if you don't want to hear it, don't tell me about
it.

My ex, her mother, from what she tells me, her mother wishes that she
wasn't never born. No, not the mother, the mother told her that she wish
that she never had her as a baby. I think that's really fucked up for
her to say something like that. That and other things caused us to break
up. But our conversation last night got me upset.

A year ago, her family had a reunion in Washington, DC. The mother has
another son. The son, while at the reunion asked the mother about his
father. This was after the mother pulled him outside and told him all
kinds of madness about her own daughter. Her daughter just happened to
overhear the conversation. She told me that she felt really bad. Her
brother couldn't afford to trave there, so she had bought his ticket.
The brother then approached her and wanted info on his father which the
mother told her about. The mother told her not to say anything to him
about his father. At this point of the conversation, I went off.

You know what? I don't even know why I even to bother to write about
this. One thing I do know, I know that it bothers me. I told my ex that
she has to break the cycle. Cause if she doesn't, she is gonna be just
like her other as she gets older. She doesn't see it, cause she is being
her, and she see no other way to be. Her mother has blamed her for
everything has gone wrong in her life, and now she feels like no matter
what she does, she will never live up to her mother's expectations.

--michaelchappell